Wait, What?

I know what you’re thinking — “I don’t understand anything about this website.” Yeah, I can see that. Let me explain.

We’ll start with the name. It is not a porn site. Sorry. If you are looking for websites featuring that type of moisture, there are plenty of fine sites out there just a Google search away. This just isn’t one of them (unless someone wants to buy the suggestive domain from me).

Anyway, did you ever notice New York is always covered in a film of moisture? In the summer, it is so hot and humid everyone and everything seems to be sweating. We have rain in the spring and snow in the winter. Maybe things are dry in October. Maybe. Otherwise, the streets, the subways, the buildings, the people — everything is moist. Uncomfortably so. It’s one of the “charms” of this lovely city.

Now to the dropline. It makes no sense, you say. If I’m a former New Yorker living in New York, then I am a New Yorker. In theory and probably in reality you’d be right, but it’s a bit more complicated than that.

I was born and raised in New York, but moved to sunny Los Angeles and spent nine glorious years there. I loved that city and had no interest in moving back. But then a woman came along, and, well, you can guess the rest. So now I’m back.

But I don’t want to be. I hate this place. It is an absolute pit. A pit that for some reason has grown far more expensive than it used to be. Or should be. A pit that everyone seems to think is be the be all and end all of the world. It’s not. A pit where everything is moist.

So now I consider myself an Angeleno, hence the “former New Yorker living in New York” bit. I want as little to do with this hell hole as possible.

I have become what I’ve always hated — one of those people who despise where they live. I used to tell those people “then don’t live here.” Well, I have no choice. I guess they didn’t either. I should have been nicer to those people.

So I figured I’d start a site to highlight just how awful New York really is (except for the Mets), from the viewpoint of someone who used to think this was such a great place, until I lived somewhere else and saw that there was a better way. And of course, to point out how everything is moist.

Sigh. I hate this city.